Becoming pregnant after experiencing loss can be a conflicting time emotionally. While everyone is excited for you and eager to celebrate, you may not be feeling the same way. It’s common to lack excitement, feel worried, scared, unsure, and even unhopeful. Many women report feeling they worry about getting excited in the event something bad happens again. These emotions can be overwhelming to navigate and make pregnancy after loss challenging in many ways. If you are newly pregnant again after experiencing loss, the range of emotions you are feeling are valid and okay.
Being pregnant after experiencing one or more losses can be overwhelming mentally, emotionally and psychically. Because this time can bring up a wide range of emotions, I encourage you to consider the following things to help you navigate through this time.
Get support.
You do not have to go through this time alone, and I strongly advise that you don’t. Going through loss is traumatic and life changing. It can create symptoms of anxiety and depression and strongly impact your mental health. Becoming pregnant again can and will bring up old feelings of sadness, grief, and worry. If you’re not already connected to one, I encourage you to consider therapy and talking to a trained mental health counselor to help you navigate this time.
Talk about your feelings with people who get it. Again, it’s important to not try to go through this alone. Having a few people in your corner that you can open up to and talk about how you’re feeling and receive the support you are needing is essential. This could be trusted friends, family members, or even other individuals who have been through similar experiences. You can also gain support through peer support groups in your area or online.
Focus on what is happening versus what has happened in the past.
For your mental well-being, it’s important to focus on what is actually happening, not what may or may not happen. This can be very challenging to do initially but with time and practice, you can learn this skill. Focusing on things outside of the present moment, whether behind or in front of us, can be a significant trigger of anxiety. If this is challenging for you, consider seeking support through therapy to help you learn this skill.
Do things intentionally to help you enjoy this pregnancy.
Pregnancy is challenging no matter what and pregnancy after loss is uniquely challenging in other ways. It can be helpful to do things while pregnant that allow you to enjoy the pregnancy. This could look like allowing yourself to become excited, buying baby items, planning a baby shower, getting a perinatal massage, and more. These activities can help reduce anxiety, improve happiness, and allow you to connect with your baby.
Stay away from triggering online content.
What you absorb will stay with you, whether that is positive or negative. In order to help you navigate this new pregnancy, it’s important to put space between you and unwanted/unnecessary triggers of anxiety or sadness. While the internet and social media can be great places, it can also be triggering to read or hear about other people’s trauma. You do not need to know all the things that could possibly go wrong. That is unhelpful to your journey navigating this new experience.
Do things daily that make you feel good.
It’s so important to engage in activities that are uplifting, positive, and not stressful. This can drastically help reduce feelings of depression and anxiety. It can also make this pregnancy more positive and even enjoyable. This could look like continuing to hangout with friends, going for a walk, doing things that make you laugh, and sticking to your usual routine as much as possible.
While there is no one thing that is going to make this time in your life easy, you can navigate a new pregnancy and all that comes with it. If you are struggling and need support to help you cope with grief, navigate pregnancy after loss, and reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression, I am here to help. Reach out to me today to learn how we can work together to help you during this time. You are not alone in this.
